Smiling Can Predict Marriage

A smile can predict marital happiness lho. So be careful when smiling. At least according to recent studies. Simply by looking at the smile that captured in the photographs of husband and wife, we can know whether their marriage happy or not.

Psychologists from DePauw University, Indiana, has conducted research on a number of people. In the photo they were given a couple, and asked to give a value of 1-10 on the intensity of smiling couple. It turns out the couple who looked smiling with low intensity proved to have been divorced. While they are smiling more brightly and impressed iklas, marriage survives. The assessment classified ranging from a smile that just lift the tip lip until the cause wrinkles in the eye.

More Positive

There are also tests in people aged over 65 who requested photographs memerlihatkan their childhood. Apparently they are a lot of smiles in the photo only very few were divorced. Even those who frown on her picture many potentially five times the experience of divorce than those who smile.

"Maybe a smile represents a positive life attitude of someone in the future,"said psychologist Matthew Hertenstein, one of these scientists. It could also be said that a smile makes other people involved are happy, including his life partner, so the marriage can be more lasting. Another theory is that people who like tersebyum usually attract a lot of friends so friends that will help him overcome a troubled marriage.

Well, from now on take frequent smiles. Just do not smile alone yes. Later it feared people.

read more...

spirit at any time

for Life is Over 'Life'
Let's see great people. What makes them (and you!) Could spirit all the time. Some of the principles below will be helpful:

 1. Awareness

Ever watch a football game? As viewers, we can see how all the players compete to move the ball, shift gears to each other, running, dodging, survive, and occasionally nyikut opponent. We can see the mistakes of the players. Also see the greatness-greatness. We cheered when the players do greatness. We also cried - but frustrated or angry - if they make mistakes.

Well, brother can you imagine if you become spectators, as well as football players last? If you can do for your everyday life, that is consciousness. The great football players have a high awareness. Physically, they are located on the ground, moving like the other players. But they are also moving consciousness. They are aware of their physical and what they think and feel. They are 'monitors' all the movements of other players. That's what makes them are in the right position.

When you are fully aware of yourself, then you become the master of your own self. You become a leader for yourself. You take control of your self. You are not only aware of the physical, mind, and your feelings. You are even aware of the battle within yourself. Yep, the battle within themselves between the ego (desire) and your conscience. You know inside you there is a battle. You are a spectator battle. To whom do you side with up to you. You have the power to choose one between them, or not vote at all. The power to choose is Free Will (Freedom Originator / Choosing)

 2. Free Will
Suppose you were a guest to my house. I offered you a drink: "Want to drink? Tea or Coffee? "What's your answer? When you answer the tea, then you just use the power of Free Choice (Free Choice). So also when you answer the coffee, free choice. You are free to choose not to drink anything, but my choice is limited by the offer.

You referred to activate the Free Will, if you answered: "If I'm drinking Durian Juice, Mr Supardi not mind do you?" Well, your choice is out of bounds that I created. Free Will you have active.

 Free Will is a force you to freely choose good things for you. People who have been conscious and active of his free will, then he would be easily choose sides with the conscience to beat and control the ego (desire). Two of these things is (consciousness and free will) that makes great people can always survive and out of various difficulties.

3. Confidence

A street musician won the Indonesian Idol. Yep, that's what has been Aris proved to us all. Where it starts winning? Confidence!. Aris conviction was the one who set fire to himself for an audition and undergo the process with gusto. Confidence what? The belief that he was worthy and capable to become Indonesian Idol. And his belief was true and proven.

 In Indonesia, many other singers who might have a greater ability of Aris. But they had no confidence. As a result, they do not act. They are silent and be a spectator only. That's why the ability is not a major factor in shaping the beliefs that burn. So what is the main factor? FREE WILL. Free Will make anyone could choose to believe even when other factors are not sure it makes.

So if you're poor, ugly, disabled, low education, living in villages, harassed by many people - including your parents should support you, intellect (IQ) is low and deceased, you can still choose to believe and have a dream to achieve success large. Even become convinced is the only hope you are to succeed it.

When your faith is unshakable, your spirit will continue to burn all the time. Indeed, it occasionally dim the fire spirit. But he will never die. He even continues to grow.

 4. The purpose of the burn.

 There is no purpose, no passion! A life without any purpose will weaken you. You will only live a very boring routine. Even had a goal was not necessarily to make your spirit at any time. You not only need just a destination. You need a destination that burns. The aim is to make you sleep late and wake up Fajr. A very important goal for yourself. Objectives that can make you willing to sacrifice anything deminya. Well, set a goal is like this, and your spirit will never achieve it off. The spirit will continue to smolder and burn you.

5. Willpower

Determination, super strong intention that makes you stand in any storm in achieving your goals. Commitment is an awareness of the difficulties that will confront on the road. With determination, you will only spirit when facing difficulties. You are aware, only by overcoming various difficulties is, then your desire will be achieved. Precisely the difficulty is you become a stronger person, more capable, more confident, and more vibrant. You also realize that man was created to deal with major difficulties. That is the belief of God in humans the largest.

 6. Discipline

Discipline is simply doing what is right and important to you. It does not matter whether it is right and important that you like or not. And it is very likely what is right and important that it is not fun, make you suffer and cause pain, physical pain, mental, financial, and social. But the discipline is really freeing your soul. Free and independent spirit that makes your spirit at any time.

 I wake up before Fajr. And this is - initially - very unpleasant. When the alarm on my phone yelling, physically I still want to sleep. Likewise, my thoughts and feelings. "Ah, more delicious nih. Five minutes here we go. " Fortunately, I realized, using the freewill to side with conscience. So every day, I wake up before Fajr discipline. And in every day, I actually felt calm and happy. Indeed, when we successfully overcome the difficulties, then that is the reward. And returns it's really worth it.

 7. Focus

Focus is a promise to be in your path, whatever happens at that point. If you have chosen to do business selling vegetables for example, then it remains on track, despite the difficulties ahead. When you stay in your lane (focus), then you will be more experts from time to time. Various difficulties in your path that you have been familiar, and you are skilled in addressing it. You even keep increasingly fast in doing so. While you will be treading the path from scratch. But your level continues to rise. You can never go back to zero again. That's the advantage of focus.

The problem with people who do not focus on is they have to start from zero continuously to the various paths they choose. And this is obviously a waste of resources.

 Well, brother ... good-spirited. Every time!

read more...

Causes of Failure

You know the cause of your failure? Yes, everybody has experienced failure. The ability to understand what caused the failure you will make yourself more intelligent and wise so it will be able to walk back better. To understand the causes of failure, needed the ability to think analytically and critically. We need to avoid emotional thinking and is unable to find the cause of failure. If you are unable to find the cause or will issue you a failure, then you will not be able to fix it.This article will explain how to trace the cause of failure, even the main cause of the so-called root causes so that if we can find it and be able to handle it, we'll run better.
Avoid Emotional Causes of Failure. It should be understood, you have to distinguish between the intuitive and emotional. Intuitive can provide solutions, but not with the emotional, often only defend their own ego. If you focus your mind to defend his own ego, then you will always assume that the problem is on the outside, including the existing outside of your control. If a problem is outside, then we will never get over it. You will experience the same failure your continuous finally gave up and lazy to try again.
Examples of emotional causes are:
·         Blaming others
·         Blame conditions
·         Blaming events
·         Blames government
·         Blames rival
·         Blame society
·         Blame destiny
Anyway, he will blame anything outside itself. If the problem is beyond you, then you will not be able to cope. Especially for the latter, blame fate, it will close all your mind to find a solution. After all, it's fate, whatever is done will be useless.
If we can not beat what is outside ourselves, whether we should blame themselves as the cause of our failure?
Perhaps many motivators that says you should blame yourself absolutely.
You find it difficult to accept?
OK, if you believe there are external factors as the cause of failure, but I still invite you to continue to start checking yourself before blaming outsiders. This will provide an amazing experience, giving lessons, and valuable lessons than you focus blame outsiders as the cause of your failure. Take Responsibility
If you want to be a forward-thinking, then you must take responsibility for your failure. You failed because you own, because of your error.
Let's see, what causes people to fail?
The answer is because he quit. The word "quit" has two meanings. First stop acting to achieve its objectives. The two stopped to adjust goals to existing conditions.
I think you already understand the purpose of the first. You will fail if you quit acting to achieve your goals. The question is why someone quit acting?
There are two possible answers. The first because he did not know what else to do. The second is because he no longer wants to act. But the first answer can be terminated immediately. If you do not know what you should do, then you should find out. Trying so you know what you should do. The question is whether you want to find out? So the point is the will.
So we can conclude that the cause of a person stopped is because there is no will.
Secondly, sometimes, we can stop because it is unfavorable circumstances. Suppose you have a goal to become a civil servant. You do not stop to try to be civil servants to take exams every year. However, you still fail due to conditions beyond the age of becoming a civil servant. And you called failed to become a civil servant. Yes, you failed to become a civil servant if you quit.
You are no longer possible to be a civil servant because of old age. However, you can still adjust your goals with current conditions. What are your goals actually become civil servants? If you want to serve the community, there are other ways, even if you do not become civil servants. If you want to get a pension, there is a third party that can manage your retirement. The question is whether you want to adjust your goals? Yes, back to your own wishes.
Are you able to accept that the cause of failure comes from your self? Please write on the form causes the failure of your comment, God willing, I will show that the causes of the failure begins with your self.

read more...

Arti Hadirmu

Tuhan, apa arti dari persahabatan yang sebenarnya??
benarkah tak ada kata persahabatan di dalam perbedaan?
mengenalnya adalah suatu anugerah, ku tau tak ada yang kebetulan dalam-Mu, semua dalam rencana tangan-Mu yang indah. Jujur ku katakan, ku tak mengerti dengan apa yang Engkau ingin bentuk dalam hidup ku kali ini…
beban ku terasa berat Tuhan tapi ku tak mau berhenti berjalan…
belum selesai apa yang ku hadapi saat ini sudah Engkau tambahkan lagi…
Tapi ku tau apa yang Engkau lakukan mendewasakan ku…
Tuhan ku berdoa tetap jagai dia dengan kasih-Mu jangan biarkan ia terluka…
yang ku ingat sekarang ini adalah
“…hidup ku terlalu singkat untuk melihat keindahan karya-Mu…”
Teman jika kau membaca ini…
aku tulus berdoa, biar Dia yang beri kau kekuatan tuk hadapi yang terjadi…
Satu yang ku percaya…
“seorang sahabat menaruh kasih setiap waktu, dan menjadi seorang saudara di dalam kesukaran.”
sahabat tak kenal perasaan kecewa…
Dia tak tinggal diam kawan… percaya yang terjadi adalah proses pemurian sebuah permata.

read more...

Mengenali Diri Sendiri

saudaraku, genggam erat-erat tali keimanan kita. kenalilah diri. pahamilah kebiasaanya. rasakan seriap getaran-getarannya. lalu berhati-hati dan kontrollah kemauan dan kecenderungan. waspadai kekurangannya dan manfaatkan kelebihannya. berdo'alah pada Allah agar ia menyikapkan ilmu-Nya tentang diri. sebagaimana senandung do'a yang dilantunkan Yusuf bin Asbath, murid Sofyan Ats Tsauri: "Allhumma arrifni nafsii", Ya Allah kenalkan aku dengan diriku ..... Jiwa manusia banyak menyimpan rahasia. Misteri hati dan jiwa manusia sulit dikenali dengan baik kecuali dengan bantuan Allah swt kepada kita. Karena itu ulama terkenal yang ahli dalam masalah kejiwaan Sahal bin Abdillah mengatakan bahwa mengenali diri sendiri itu sulit dan lebih halus dari pada mengenali musuh. artinya, aib dan kekurangan yang terselubung dalam diri, sangatlah sulit dideteksi, dan harus dibuka oleh Allah agar seseorang dapat membersihkan diri dan jiwanya

read more...

SAYA MENGERTI, HATI YG TERLUKA SULIT MEMBUAT PIKIRAN TERBUKA

Saya mencintaimu bukan “karena” tetapi “walaupun”. Satu kalimat tersebut adalah terjemahan bebas dari sebuah kalimat Latin (maaf, saya lupa persisnya sehingga tidak saya tulis kalimat latin tersebut disini). Kalimat tersebut sepertinya sungguh mudah diucapkan atau dituliskan. Bahkan, berlogika singkat pun masih bisa terasa mudah. Tapi cobalah untuk merenungkannya sedikit lebih lama (dan lebih serius kalau bisa).
Benarkah anda bisa? Benarkah anda semua yang mengaku sebagai sang pencinta sanggup melakukan itu? Dari berbagai banyak komentar yang masuk ke dalam Blog Puisi & Prosa sederhana ini, sungguh banyak sekali yang melekatkan jadi satu antara cinta tulus, cinta sejati, dengan balas dicintai (cinta tulus pula atau tidak saya tidak tahu???). Seolah cinta adalah keharusan. Ketika satu insan merasakan, maka insan yang lainnya harus juga merasakannya (terus merasakan bagi yang pernah berjalan beriringan).
Entah dengan anda, tapi saya pribadi sungguh terkagum dengan satu kalimat latin yang sudah saya terjemahkan bebas tersebut.
Bahasanya mungkin bisa menjadi bermacam-macam. Beberapa diantaranya yang sempat terpikir adalah:

• Walapun kelak engkau tak seindah lagi seperti hari ini, aku akan tetap mencintaimu (tulus).
• Walaupun kelak engkau tak lagi mencintaiku, aku akan tetap mencintaimu (tulus).
• Walaupun esok mungkin engkau telah melupakanku, aku akan tetap mencintaimu (tulus).
• dan lain-lain.

Bukan:

• Karena aku mencintaimu (tulus), maka engkau harus mencintaiku (tulus).
• Karena kemarin engkau sudah menerimaku, maka selama aku mencintaimu (tulus), kau harus terus mencintaiku (tulus)
• dan masih banyak lagi lainnya, silahkan anda tambahkan sendiri.

Bukan maksud saya untuk menjadi naif, munafik, atau manusia super. Posting ini hanya saya buat sebagai bahan renungan untuk semuanya. Sebab ketika seseorang itu berlalu dari kehidupan kita, cinta tidak harus mati. Life must go on, tapi sekali lagi cinta tidak harus mati, pilihan terbaik ada di tangan anda sendiri bagaimana baiknya, tapi memaksakan cinta berbalas (atau menginginkan sekali cinta berbalas) hanya akan mencederai putihnya cinta.
Menjelang akhir posting, saya ingin bertanya sedikit tentang kesediaan waktu untuk sedikit berfilsafat. Mungkin, ketika semuanya sudah terasa buntu dan menyesakkan dada, kembali pada filosofi segala sesuatu (sesuai yang anda cari) mungkin bisa bermanfaat. Sekedar mengembalikan semuanya pada makna hakiki segala sesuatunya ada dalam kehidupan, mungkin bisa menjadi sedikit pencerahan.
Saya mengerti bahwa hati yang terluka terkadang sulit untuk membuat pikiran terbuka. Saya mengerti bahwa jiwa yang mencinta seringkali berharap adanya balasan yang setimpal saat itu juga dan dengan orang yang dimaksudkan itu juga. Saya mengerti, jika harapan itu tidak terkabul, satu-persatu mulai bertanya pertanyaan yang sama pada Tuhan YME. InsyaAllah, saya mengerti itu semua, sebab saya pun pernah mengalami. Bagaimanapun juga berjiwa besar tidak akan pernah membuat kita kecil bukan???

read more...

Inti Kehidupan adalah Ikhlas

A.    Tujuan diciptakan Manusia

“Dan Aku tidak menciptakan jin dan manusia melainkan supaya mereka beribadah kepada-ku.”

(Q.S. adz-Dzaariyaat [51]:56)

Ayat ini menyikapi hakikat kehidupan manusia diatas bumi ini. Sesungguhnya hanya Allah-lah yang mengetahui untuk apa kita diciptakan. Ingat, kita ini sekedar diciptakan. Dan Allah-lah yang menghendaki semua itu dan berkuasa penuh. Didalam al-Qur’an, secara lengkap Allah menjelaskan apa hakikat hidup manusia.

B.     Ibadah Tidak Diterima Kecuali dengan Ikhlas

Jelaslah bahwa ikhlas merupakan syarat mutlak yang benar-benar tidak boleh cacat sedikit pun. Ia menuntut kesempurna. Siapa yang cacat dalam masalah ini maka ibadahnya bisa batal. Bila cacatnya fatal (syirik akbar) maka yang batal adalah seluruh amal dan ia keluar dari Islam meski ia tetap mengaku orang Islam yang shalat.

C.     Kesimpulan :

Manusia Diciptakan Agar Menjadi Hamba yang Ikhlas

Dari subbab diatas diatas kita dapat memahami bahwa manusia diciptakan dengan tujuan agar mereka beribadah kepada Allah. Ibadah tidak akan diterima, tidak ada gunanya, sia-sia belaka, tidak dianggap sebagai ibadah kecuali dengan keikhlasan (murni), bahkan pelakunya mendapat hukuman bila ibadah dilakukan tidak ikhlas.

Dengan demikian dapat kita diambil kesimpulan bahwa: Manusia diciptakan agar menjadi hamba-hamba ikhlas. Itulah hakikat tujuan penciptaan manusia.

Wallahu a’lam. ۩  

read more...